By Jodi Wiff and Mike Krutza
We all have different trigger points – when the hair on the back of our neck rises and we have the strong desire to flee the room. For me it is when I hear ‘whiners’ begin with a tirade of their latest problem. I can feel my inner voice wanting to reach out and stop them in their tracks. I’ve learned a few tips that you may find helpful in dealing with the whiner in your workplace.
Tip 1. Don’t feed the dog. Do not get sucked into their vacuum of whining. It is a deadly trap. People become their food…as it gives them empathy. It feeds more whining and the direction of whining does not bring energy to the table, just a camaraderie of ‘poor us’.
When I mentor people, I give them a heads up about getting pulled into a whiner’s web…it doesn’t serve anyone well.
Tip 2. Be clear that the whining is the choice of the individual…the whining can turn the individual into feeling like a victim…’poor is me’. Life is tough, and we have all taken a turn at ‘whining’. Just be sure you know what you’re doing, and get over it. A 30 second whine is OK, knowing that you’re moving on after the 30 seconds is key. It is when people continue the whine, and feel sorry for themselves that it starts feeling more like they are acting as a victim. It you don’t like something, take action and move forward, slight as it may be…move forward.
3. Whining is a choice, one that is not accepted. Be up front and truthful – whining will have a negative impact on the team. Make it clear that workplace is a no whine zone.
Jodi Wiff and Mike Krutza, authors
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Wiff and Krutza turned an organization around…culturally and financially. http://lighthouse-leadership.com
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